Morganville on Facebook
by TheChosenAlpaca
Summary: SPOILERS! DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN'T READ ALL THE BOOKS! Claire, Shane, Michael and Eve all make a private chatroom using Facebook, but only a few moments into the chatting with each other, they find that the whole of Morganville found their chatroom. My sister has helped and also decided to add more than a few swear words into it, and it has some text talk, just a warning! :D
1. Morganville on Facebook PT 1

**Morganville on Facebook!**

**Chatroom #1**

ClaireTheSmartOne: WOOOO Leaving Morganville 2day wooooo!

Comments

Shane: YAAY Buuuut the car broke down so, we're not leaving

_OllieBear likes this_

ClaireTheSmartOne: Go screw yourself Ollie

ILoveBunnySlippers: What do you want Oliver to screw? I don't understand. Oh and Claire, I need you to get me some more frog eyes. :)

Shane: What?

OllieBear: Oh lord Myrnin! Will you shut up!

ClaireTheSmartOne: How many do you need?

_ILoveBunnySlippers has poked ClaireTheSmartOne_

ClaireTheSmartOne: Um thanks for the poke...

IloveBunnySlippers: You're welcome. And I need 27.8 more eyes.

Shane: I don't get you two...

_ClaireTheSmartOne likes this_

_ILoveBunnySlippers has poked Shane_

QueenGothika: HEY WAZZUUUP

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: You like my long name? Hey Eve.

QueenGothika: It's QUEEN GOTHIKA here.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Ok QUEEN GOTHIKA :D

QueenGothika: No caps dude...

Shane: Hey Eve :P

_QueenGothika has shot Shane in the face_

Shane: OW! Anyway where are Claire and her Crazy boss of her's?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Making out in the closet. I can hear them.

_OllieBear dislikes this_

_Shane dislikes this_

Shane: YOU ARE JOKING RIGHT?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: maybe lol yeah dude. They went on a private chat talking about rabbit liver, Bob the Spider, and Frog eyes.

Shane: Oh ok, poor bunnies.

OllieBear: BOW DOWN BEFORE YOUR NEW FOUNDER!

_AmelieTheIcyQueen dislikes this_

AmelieTheIcyQueen: *cough cough* Oliver... You're to meet me in the room

OllieBear: SCORE! I mean Oh no!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: O.o dude wtf?

ClaireTheSmartOne: I'm back, oh Amelie, before you go I saw Magnus in my room searching my underwear draw.

_ILoveBunnySlippers likes this_

Shane: MYRNIN WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU!?

IloveBunnySlippers: What does 'WTF' mean? IS it a code? If it's not nice, I'll eat you.

_OllieBear likes this_

Shane: It uh means...'Welcome To Facebook!'

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: nice save dude.

_ClaireTheSmartOne has entered the group chat_

IloveBunnySlippers: Why thank you Shane. And a WTF to you too.

ClaireTheSmartOne: MYRNIN DON'T BE CRUEL TO SHANE!

IloveBunnySlippers: But WTF means welcome to facebook! I was welcoming him to facebook when he said it to me.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Exactly.

QueenGothika: I'm hungry.

OllieBear: What's new fatty? You've gained 5 pounds this week alone.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: I will rape you Oliver!

QueenGothika: I hope not...

Shane: Anyway, WUU2?

QueenGothika: I'm in Myrnin's lab and I found a chocolate Halloween eye. It tastes weird though.

ILoveBunnySlippers: NOOOOOO MY FROG'S EYES! STOP YOU MENACE YOU'RE EATING MY PRECIOUS EYES!

QueenGothika: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

_Shane likes this_

_OllieBear likes this_

_ILoveBunnySlippers hates this_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: ...Eve, brush your teeth and burn your mouth before you kiss me.

QueenGothika: :'( I'm just throwing up this shit!

_ILoveBunnySlippers hates this_

Shane: Awkward

Meanwhile on a different chatroom

ILoveBunnySlippers: So Doctor Goldman, Bob is sick today, I kissed him a lot thinking he would get better BUT he didn't, is he going to be ok?!

THEOTHEOTHAT'SME!: Myrnin, it's a ***** spider! Get a pet bunny or something cute! They would match your slippers!

ILoveBunnySlippers: I'll get a bunny as well! And what does ****** mean?

THEOTHEOTHAT'SME!: It means I have my censor on. Bye

ILoveBunnySlippers: Good bye Theo

END of that certain chatroom (Sorry for it being weird)

Shane: So um Claire ;) we're alone in this chatroom

ClaireTheSmartOne: Correction, You're alone in this chatroom!

_ClaireTheSmartOne has left_

**On chatroom #1**

QueenGothika: So whats up?

ClaireTheSmartOne: making out with Shane against a wall while I'm on the phone chatting...um I mean studying...

Shane: SCORE!

OllieBear: Amelie, that was wonderful, I mean horrible :'(

AmelieTheIcyQueen: Good.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Good job dude SCORE!

OllieBear: SCORE!

AmelieTheIcyQueen: Oh good gracious

BobTheSpider: Hello :3

Shane: Myrnin, did you make Bob an account?

ILoveBunnySlippers: I thought you were kissing Claire! I have pictures.

_IloveBunnySlippers has included a file with 42 pictures of Shane and Claire kissing_

_IloveBunnySlippers has been kicked out the chatroom for showing nudity_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Um nudity? I'm not looking at those pictures now...

Shane: DUDE! YOU WERE GOING TO LOOK!?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Um this is weird.

_Shane has poked Claire in the eye_

ClaireTheSmartOne: OW Thanks Shane ^.^

Shane: HAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA! Myrnin GET OFF MY ACCOUNT! NO! YES! NO! YES! NO! YOU LITTLE ************** HEY WHO TURNED CENSOR ON?

_Shane has been kicked out_

ClaireTheSmartOne: At least he didn't poke me in the eye again.

IloveBunnySlippers: Hola

Shane: YAY I'm back.

_ClaireTheSmartOne has booted Shane and IloveBunnySlippers_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: SCORE!

OllieBear: SCORE!

QueenGothika: SHUT UP!

ClaireTheSmartOne: lol

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Sorry Eve.

QueenGothika: It's ok Michael!

IloveBunnySlippers: ;) I'm baaack

AmelieTheIcyQueen: Hello old friend.

OllieBear: Hello my beautiful I mean horrible and ugly Queen, hello.

AmelieTheIcyQueen: SCORE! Oh good lord! Michael stop hacking me! Okay your 'highness' :(

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: *cough cough* innocent...

IloveBunnySlippers: Did you enjoy MY frog's eyes? Even?

QueenGothika: IT'S EVE!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Okay EVE!

_QueenGothika has left_

Shane: Look what ya did now!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: How come your name on here is just 'Shane' it's boring man.

_Shane has changed his screen name to AwesomeDude_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Um anyway, do you think Eve is coming back?

AmelieTheIcyQueen: OLIVER! YOU CAN'T SAY THAT ONLINE!

AmelieTheIcyQueen: Wrong chatroom...

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Ya think?

QueenGothika: I never left! It was to test you all! AND YOU FAILED! You called me 'Eve' it's QUEEN GOTHIKA

AwesomeDude: I heard there was a movie about that. Queen Gothika was so ugly and zombie-like that everyone killed themselves.

_ClaireTheSmartOne has hit AwesomeDude_

AwesomeDude: Feisty and OW! :-/

VoldyVoldy: Harry Potter! The Boy Who Lived!

AwesomeDude: Myrnin, you have totally whacked out this time.

IloveBunnySlippers: How'd you know I was Voldy?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZZZZZZZZZA AAAAAAYYYYYYY

QueenGothika: OH NO! IT HAS MICHAEL

VoldyVoldy: I hacked Michael :D

_ClaireTheSmartOne has left_

_AwesomeDude has left_

_QueenGothika has left_

_Stalker101 has left_

AmelieTheIcyQueen: Monica was stalking us. OllieBear, we're not safe to...do stuff on chatrooms anymore :(

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: I KNEW IT!

OllieBear: Umm this is awkward. DO NOT TELL ANYONE MICHAEL!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: I'm going to tell Eve, Claire, Shane, um, wow, I need more friends.

OllieBear: Well there's Naomi, Granma Day, Lisa Day, Myrnin, Jason, Monica, Gina, Jennifer, I just told you a lot of people you can tell and ruin our reputation. See! It's not that hard!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Thanks dude! Peace.

AmelieTheIcyQueen: YOU BLASTARD FOOL! OLIVER YOU- YOU NAZI!

_MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp has left_

_NaomiLovesGirls has entered the chatroom_

NaomiLovesGirls: Uhh who changed my screen name?

AmelieTheIcyQueen: Naomi, me and Oliver are not involved in a romantic relationship!

_NaomiLovesGirls has changed her screen name to Naomi _

Naomi: Yeah sure. Since I never asked and no one told me it screams that you are involved dumbasses!

OllieBear: YOU MUSTN'T TELL ANYONE!

Naomi: I already told my sister, who texted everyone in Morganville AND Texas, including Blacke, Morley isn't shocked but he's jealous, he wanted to ask Oliver first. :)

**BLACKE CHATROOM**

MorleyTheGREAT: This is an issue; Oliver knows how I feel about him, I KNOW HE FEELS IT TOO! I LOVE HIMMM

Minion1573: I just think you're gay.

MorleyTheGREAT: Well go ahead and state the obvious. Chienne.

Minion3: I love you Morley in a non gay way, so, just talk to Ollie about it, and then you can get married and stuff.

Minion1573: You are gay, I quit and I'm going back to Morganville TOTALLY GAAY

SpatulaThatCallsPeopleGay: THAT'S TOTAAALLLLY GAAAY!

Minion3: Myrnin go screw yourself.

SpatulaThatCallsPeopleGay: I'm not Myrnin, Guess who I am!

MorleyTheGREAT: Um, Claire? No wait! Granma Day! :D

SpatulaThatCallsPeopleGay: Nope ;)

MorleyTheGREAT: Then it's Eve.

SpatulaThatCallsPeopleGay: I'm NOT a girl.

MorleyTheGREAT: Then you must be Oliver 3

SpatulaThatCallsPeopleGay: NO! It's not a frickin' vamp!

MorleyTheGREAT: Hmmm, Jason?

SpatulaThatCallsPeopleGay: OH MY GOD YOU EVEN SAID JASON BUT NOT ME!

MorleyTheGREAT: Shane? NO wait, it must be Myrnin, wait Myrnin is a vampire, um it's Richard.

SpatulaThatCallsPeopleGay: No, I'm not Dick.

Minion3: It must be a random male from Morganville.

SpatulaThatCallsPeopleGay: You are stupid. It's SHANE!

_SpatulaThatCallsPeopleGay has left_

**On a private Chatroom with Theo Goldman, Shane stalking the chat, Monica stalking as-well and Claire stalking the chat, also Theo is talking to Myrnin.**

THEOTHEOTHAT'SME!: Myrnin, you cannot do that!

IloveBunnySlippers: I know but I want to remember what a kiss feels like.

THEOTHEOTHAT'SME!: I know but you can't kiss Shane just because you can't remember what kissing is like. Plus he's not gay, and you're not gay.

AwesomeDude: Suddenly, stalking this chat seems kinda a bad idea...

ClaireTheSmartOne: You're my boyfriend, how'd you think I feel!

IloveBunnySlippers: Well hello STALKERS!

BitchPrincess: Um Hi.

_THEOTHEOTHAT'SME! has left_

ClaireTheSmartOne: Monica! You were STALKING them!? Sicko.

BitchPrincess: Yeah well you were stalking as-well.

AwesomeDude: Don't forget I was stalking as-well.

IloveBunnySlippers: Well if I can't kiss Shane then who?

AwesomeDude: YOU'RE PILLOW

ClaireTheSmartOne: You're poster of Voldemort which I caught you kissing yesterday.

IloveBunnySlippers: Yes, but I don't know what a _real_ kiss feels like! I wish Voldemort was real, that reminds me Claire, come to my lab right away I need your help with _something_.

ClaireTheSmartOne: This isn't about Voldemort, is it?

AwesomeDude: Oh My God THIS IS TORTURE you suck Myrnin.

IloveBunnySlippers: It IS NOT about Voldy- Voldemort.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Bye Shane and Bye skank. Love ya Shane.

BitchPrincess: ugh.

AwesomeDude: Shut up Monica!

BitchPrincess: No.

AwesomeDude: I'm going to hurt you.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Haha.. Um I'll be back soon.

_ClaireTheSmartOne has left_

**At the lab**

**Claire's POV**

Well I'm here, and so is Voldemort, uh what? "Voldemort?" Myrnin started kissing Voldemort but Voldemort screeched "AVADA KEDAVRA!" Myrnin started laughing and giggling "HEHE IT TICKLES!" Then he tripped over a hammer and knocked himself unconscious. "Hello, um what's up Voldy?" I poked him in the eye. "NYEEEEAAAAH" Voldemort shouted. Myrnin woke up just as I grabbed the hammer he tripped over and I started to crush Voldemort's skull and I used the sharp end to claw out his eyes, he dyed then his body vanished. Myrnin ran up to me and grabbed me. "Let me go!" He didn't let me go, then he leaned down and _kissed me_ I slapped him in the face, and staked him with a wooden stake (silver tipped) and ran out! I noticed, when I was on the stairs, that Shane was behind a bookcase and he was frozen, he leaped out, grabbed Myrnin's silver gun pellet thing and fired, blasts of silver flew out. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHH" Myrnin screeched and he opened the door and ran outside in mid-day, then he went back inside and in his bedroom. I flinched then called Shane up on the stairs. "Come on dumbass, but thanks for almost killing my vampire crazy boss" I smiled at him and he walked me home, hand in hand, then we opened up the laptop to chat with the guys. (Eve and Michael are in Hawaii on their honeymoon)

**Chatroom #1**

IloveBunnySlippers: I'm in hospital because Shane almost killed me :(

QueenGothika: uh huh...

AwesomeDude: I walked Claire home, it was a good walk.

QueenGothika: Okay... What did you do to Myrnin?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Well, Myrnin brought Voldemort to life, kissed him then tripped over a hammer, then I killed Voldemort, then Myrnin kissed me and Shane fired Myrnin's air-borne silver gun. It was sooooo cool. It was funny because Myrnin ran outside in the sun half naked. He was wearing a short sleeved Hawaiian shirt, bright shorts and vampy bunny slippers.

IloveBunnySlippers: I'm very glad and impressed that you remembered what I was wearing, Claire. :)

AwesomeDude: Shut it ass-hat.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: I've been reading this chat carefully, and Shane, SCORE!

AwesomeDude: SCORE!

OllieBear: I'm SCOREing with Amelie SCORE

AmelieTheIcyQueen: Enough Oliver. Or I'll slap you.

OllieBear: :'( you're so MEAN!

_OllieBear has left_

IloveBunnySlippers: I WILL kill you all!

**To be continued... :D**

**And no, I was not taking any drugs while writing this. :)**


	2. Morganville on Facebook PT 2

**I OWN NOTHING YOU HEAR ME! I LIVE LIKE THIS, OWNING NOTHING! It belongs to Rachel Caine :)**

**Morganville on Facebook PART 2**

ILoveBunnySlippers: I WILL KILL YOU ALL! :D

ClaireTheSmartOne: Shane will kill you first, Pretty boy.

AwesomeDude: Anyway, I need to tell you something Claire...

ClaireTheSmartOne: What is it?

AwesomeDude: I'm pregnant.

AwesomeDude: I think it's going to be twins or triplets.

AwesomeDude: I swear I was taking the pill!

ClaireTheSmartOne: You're a guy it's impossible, you're lying, did Michael put you up to this Mr McStabby?

AwesomeDude: I told you she wasn't going to fall for it, man.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Dammit. I thought she would.

QueenGothika: Anyway, I'm tired.

AwesomeDude: And?

QueenGothika: I thought it would change the boring subject.

ILoveBunnySlippers: I'm outside your bedroom little Claire.

AwesomeDude: I'm going to leave your room now Claire...

ClaireTheSmartOne: why :(

AwesomeDude: To uh, umm, beat him up.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Don't forget he likes to kiss everyone so be careful and don't fall for his charms and looks.

AwesomeDude: I'm not gay.

QueenGothika: May I say something here?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: let the men handle it Eve.

AwesomeDude: You're in Hawaii! Shut up asshole.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Grrr

AwesomeDude: Bite me. : P

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Okay I will, you'll have to wait until my honeymoon is over though, is that ok?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Oh Shane, while you were hiding in the secret room, Myrnin broke in and now he's dragging me to his lab.

AwesomeDude: How are you on your phone talking to us then?

ILoveBunnySlippers: I let her.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Dude, you're _hiding?_

QueenGothika: What'd you expect?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Something better.

AwesomeDude: Love you :D

ClaireTheSmartOne: Ugh :( why didn't you beat him up!

QueenGothika: Idiotic Shane.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: lol

ILoveBunnySlippers: Um we're almost at my lair.

ClaireTheSmartOne: You idiot, its _lab _not _lair_, now Shane knows I made it up!

AwesomeDude: So you faked being kidnapped by Myrnin just to mock me!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Man, you were _hiding_

ClaireTheSmartOne: Idiot, why would Myrnin kidnap me?

AwesomeDude: Ok, I feel bad ish. :( Sorry

QueenGothika: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzz

AwesomeDude: I get it! You're bored! Shut up Eve!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: actually she hit her head on the 'z' key on her laptop.

ILoveBunnySlippers: So she fell asleep... I'm hungry, Claire, give me a list of people you hate and I'll um sort them out.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Monica, Gina, Jennifer, Kim and Jason.

QueenGothika: Jase isn't THAT bad.

ILoveBunnySlippers: I'm going to enjoy draining- I mean teaching them a lesson...

AwesomeDude: That's nice.

Jason:D: Helloooooo and OMG Myrnin just turned me into a vampire it's awesome OWIE! I JUST WENT INTO THE SUN AND ,.l4ejtu54y6t74urhtuea\rjugT4UREIGHNRFADBNAEOPDFUJA EBGSKDJGHBRJHBGRGVRJUEAGBREU IHNVF Owie that hurt.

QueenGothika: Umm are you ok?

Jason:D: I'm going to walk to the glass house and kill all of you HNBEDUNFYUFF THE SUN SDJTHKIRSMNGISRTIHKRIKGTIKSM inIKNTNMHBISRMGNjnihgnguhniu th5888HRGNUJERONHUOER 4 8T RIJFRRRRRRRRR8EGT UR5T 4t9i8jur eugj atrjhhhahHHAHHH HERLPPP URHGUAE0 RFHHBEHELP MUJHNUGRFGAUEW FREIGOD GUJPFRIEAJF I OW

_Jason:D has been disconnected_

ILoveBunnySlippers: I accidently may have, turned him, the rest like Monica, Gina, Jennifer and Kim are dead.

AwesomeDude: cool, wait Monica's dead? WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP YEAH SCORE!

QueenGothika: Ok, I just got back in Morganville. :') It hasn't changed in the 2 monthes we were gone sweetie.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: That's nice...

ClaireTheSmartOne: Yaaaaay!

AwesomeDude: Just do NOT go in the secret room.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Why not? Just to bug you, I'm going to go in there no matter what you do or say!

ClaireTheSmartOne: Trust me; unless you like seeing your 2 best friends naked do _not_ come in here.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Shane, SCORE!

AwesomeDude: SCORE!

OllieBear: SCORE!

ILoveBunnySlippers: SCORE!

ClaireTheSmartOne: SCORE!

QueenGothika: Seriously CB?

ClaireTheSmartOne: I just wanted to join in

AwesomeDude: This is guy stuff, it's tough.

QueenGothika: Jackass

ClaireTheSmartOne: Girls rock.

AwesomeDude: I know they do. But men are better.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Then why don't you turn gay like Morley?

AwesomeDude: 'Cuz Morley is a pussy.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Ugh whatever.

AwesomeDude: G2G LY

QueenGothika: WTF

ILoveBunnySlippers: Who joined Facebook?

ClaireTheSmartOne: G2G LY means Got to go love you

AwesomeDude: cya!

ILoveBunnySlippers: What does cya mean?

_AwesomeDude has logged out_

ClaireTheSmartOne: 'cya' means 'see ya/you/good bye' :)

QueenGothika: Do NOT teach Myrnin text talk CB

ClaireTheSmartOne: Why not? I don't like seeing him confused

_ILoveBunnySlippers likes this_

_AwesomeDude has joined chatroom_

QueenGothika: God damn you CB I don't want you teaching him text talk he'll twist it and make it stupid

ClaireTheSmartOne: but he gets so sad :'(

ILoveBunnySlippers: She's right I get sad when I don't know what you're talking about :'(

ClaireTheSmartOne: See :(

AwesomeDude: Seriously :| Claire he will get over it, the Zombie chick is right he will make it stupid and probably so that we can't even understand what he's saying

AwesomeDude: ...wow I'm good at telling people whats what, :D I should do it more often

_ClaireTheSmartOne Dislikes This_

_ILoveBunnySlippers Dislikes this_

QueenGothika: Shane please don't I'll be forced to hurt you if you do keep telling people whats what

AwesomeDude: Bite me fang banger

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Watch it Shane I'll drain you in a heartbeat if you keep calling Eve mean names you jackass

QueenGothika: It's Queen Gothika Michael :| buut thanks anyway ^_^

ILoveBunnySlippers: IHTGAFB BRB

_ILoveBunnySlippers has left chatroom_

AwesomeDude: Um what the hell does that mean?

ClaireTheSmartOne: I don't know

_ILoveBunnySlippers_ has joined chatroom

ILoveBunnySlippers: I'm back :D

AwesomeDude: Yea I noticed hey Myrnin what does "IHTGAFB BRB" mean?

ILoveBunnySlippers: Oh, you don't know? Well it means I have to go and feed bob be right back :)

QueenGothika: Ugh CB see what I mean now

ClaireTheSmartOne: oh :( I see, Myrnin could you not do text talk please?

ILoveBunnySlippers: aww okay Claire for you :)

ILoveBunnySlippers: Oh Claire I need some help cleaning the lab could you come round now please?

ClaireTheSmartOne: now? Oh, okay

_ILoveBunnySlippers likes this_

**Myrnin's**** POV**

I hope Claire gets here soon "oh Bob don't worry Claire will know what to do, you'll see" I heard Claire walking towards the ally and I heard the sound of her heartbeat slow and hypnotic, that's odd she usually walks a little faster than that hmm I wonder whats wrong. "Myrnin I'm here" Claire called as she was walking down the stairs "oh Claire yes, yes it's good you're here" I said to her "um Myrnin the lab isn't a mess ...whats going on?" oh I'll have to explain she looks a little scared "Oh I'm sorry for the deception Claire but I couldn't let your friends know." I told her " Myrnin what do you mean?" she asked me, sounding worried, yes she's always a little worried about you Myrnin isn't she yes, yes "Oh Claire it's terrible it's B-B-Bob." I burst into tears oh I couldn't help it "Oh Myrnin its okay, don't cry, tell me what's wrong with Bob." I told her about how he isn't eating and not moving I managed not to cry that time "um Myrnin he is getting a little um... well a little old, it might be his time you know spiders don't live to long." I was heartbroken to hear that "what? You mean he's ... Dying?" I started to cry again "but what if maybe I ... make him a vampire? Do you think that would work Claire?" I asked, full of hope, she looked at me like I was crazy, she said in a slow careful voice "Myrnin let me tell you, _it will not work __**don't even try!"**_ I sniffed, and stopped my tears; I stared at Claire and replied "Well ok, you go tell him that he's going to die!" She slowly backed up to the stairs then ran through the portal, well at least tried to, but I caught hold of her arm, she shouted at me "Let me **GO**!" I let go of her arm and grabbed her neck even tighter than I held her arm, and I knew just _knew _that my eyes were glowing a deep red, her face went chalk white she took something out of her pocket and she stabbed my arm with a small silver knife. "OW! AH!" I howled in pain, I dropped Claire and yanked the knife out. "You are _so going to pay_" I heard myself growl out. Her eyes widened in fear and shock, then she ran to the portal again, but I grabbed her hand fast, "I'm so sorry Claire I don't know what came over me it's just I love Bob so much I don't want him to die." I started to cry again, I let go of Claire's hand and let her run through the portal. Oh what have you done Myrnin you silly old fool, she's going to hate you now, I started to cry again.

**Back on the chatroom**

ClaireTheSmartOne: Shane, Myrnin tried to kill me!

AwesomeDude: What? What happened?!

ClaireTheSmartOne: He strangled me :'(

AwesomeDude: I'm going to rip that son of a bitch apart!

ClaireTheSmartOne: Don't, it wasn't his fault. He was just scared about his spider dying.

AwesomeDude: What? HE TRIED TO KILL YOU OVER A ******* SPIDER?! Damn Myrnin or whoever, stay off my account! No. I don't like you swearing so your censor is permanently on. HEHEHE ~Eve Ugh ********* ***** ******* ****** **** she actually did it. :| maybe if I try to say rare bad words...

_AwesomeDude has been kicked out the chatroom for trying to say *******_

ClaireTheSmartOne: DAMN YOU SHANE! UGHH Why? Now who can I talk to, other than myself which I'm doing right now

_ILoveBunnySlippers has entered the chatroom_

ILoveBunnySlippers: Hi Claire I'm sorry, I was scared about Bob and I couldn't stop myself I'm so sorry.

ClaireTheSmartOne: I'm not talking to you right now

_ClaireTheSmartOne has left the chatroom_

ILoveBunnySlippers: :'(

_ILoveBunnySlippers has left the chatroom_

**On the Chatroom two days later**

QueenGothika: You're going to have to talk to Myrnin sometime CB I know he's crazy and all but he is still your boss and Amelie will be pissed if you leave

ClaireTheSmartOne: Yeah, I know but you should have seen him eve I was scared he was going to kill me :'(

QueenGothika: It's QueenGothika :|

ClaireTheSmartOne: Okay 'QueenGothika' (sarcasm) :P

QueenGothika: lol okay so back to the Myrnin problem

ClaireTheSmartOne: ugh fine :(

_AwesomeDude has joined the chat_

AwesomeDude: What up Guys :D

QueenGothika: hey Mr. Potty mouth fixed the censor yet :D

AwesomeDude: You ****** ******* ***** I'll tear ***** in your ******* stupid

QueenGothika: I guess not then :)

AwesomeDude: ******* AHH Whyy?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Hehe. :) You can't swear :P

AwesomeDude: I can in real life so don't tempt me. ;)

QueenGothika: Mr McStabby is just messing about CB

AwesomeDude: It's getting old Eve.

QueenGothika: It's 'Queen Gothika.' Dumbass

AwesomeDude: You could call me 'Awesome Dude' or 'Cool Dude' or 'Awesomely Awesome Dude' :)

QueenGothika: Annoying dude.

ClaireTheSmartOne: PWNED

AwesomeDude: I was not Owned or Pwned!

ClaireTheSmartOne: I know you weren't Pwned, you were PWNED

QueenGothika: OOOH BURN!

_AwesomeDude has left the chat_

QueenGothika: He left. SCORE!

OllieBear: Enough. Only men say 'SCORE'

ClaireTheSmartOne: Sexist! And when did you enter Ollie?

OllieBear: DO NOT CALL ME OLLIE! And I've been stalking the chatroom all night & day.

PrincessBitch: Same here Ollie. ;)

QueenGothika: QUICK IT'S THE SKANK! RUN!

_QueenGothika has left the chatroom_

_ClaireTheSmartOne has left the chatroom_

_OllieBear has left the chatroom_

_Stalker326 has left the chatroom_

_GinaAwesome has left the chatroom_

_Jennifer has left the chatroom_

PrincessBitch: Seriously? Gina AND Jennifer left? :(

MorleyTheGREAT: Welcome new- ugh it's YOU

_MorleyTheGREAT has left the chatroom_

PrincessBitch: Haha...um he must of accidently clicked the 'X'

StalkingPrettyGirls: Hey Monica. ;) wanna chat?

PrincessBitch: How'd you know my name?

BobTheSpider: I told him.

PrincessBitch: Who are _you?_

BobTheSpider: Bob, Myrnin made me super smart. :-)

PrincessBitch: uh huh.

StalkingPrettyGirls: Leave us Bob!

BobTheSpider: You want to chat up Monica? Okay bye!

_BobTheSpider has left the chatroom_

PrincessBitch: The 'X' button isn't working :'(

StalkingPrettyGirls: Ugh. I just saw you through my window. You look like a skank. BYE! Ugly whore.

_StalkingPrettyGirls has left the chatroom_

_AwesomeDude has entered the chatroom_

AwesomeDude: Hello Monica. Is your 'x' working yet?

PrincessBitch: YOU! YOU WERE 'StalkingPrettyGirls' COLLINS I'm GOING TO KILL YOU!

AwesomeDude: Like you killed my sister? No we're not even on my side. I'm only messing with you. I'll see you burn before you lay a finger on me.

PrincessBitch: ...

_ClaireTheSmartOne has entered the chatroom_

PrincessBitch: Oh look it's the freak!

AwesomeDude: Shut up Monica.

ClaireTheSmartOne: You're still here? Get lost skank.

_PrincessBitch has left the chatroom_

AwesomeDude: So we're alone. :)

_ILoveBunnySlippers has entered the chatroom _

AwesomeDude: Ugh seriously?

ClaireTheSmartOne: What's wrong Shane? :D

AwesomeDude: Myrnin is here.

ClaireTheSmartOne: I don't see him.

ILoveBunnySlippers: Hello!

AwesomeDude: See?

ClaireTheSmartOne: You're imagining it. Just ignore your imagination Shane.

AwesomeDude: Ok :)

ILoveBunnySlippers: I'm sorry about hurting you Claire. Please forgive me.

AwesomeDude: So, whats up ClaireBear?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Nothin' much just avoiding Myrnin. :) you?

AwesomeDude: Same. I hate Myrnin I'll go hurt him BRB JKYCVB

ClaireTheSmartOne: Don't you copy what Myrnin did! What does it mean?

AwesomeDude: Be Right Back Just Killing Your Crazy Vampire Boss. BYE

_AwesomeDude has left the chatroom_

ClaireTheSmartOne: Oh well...

ILoveBunnySlippers: NO WAIT AHHHHH 7777777N5VTGCW549GTVN5RTVW95 MNW5RTGNRAOIEUGFAHHSHEFNWFGO 0HRGBHRFDEBNGFYHYDGHUIYRGH5Y HY7RW Shane keeps HTRBNGRHGBNY45 banging my head against my laptop HYDFY7NFFV RFHER GEGH4TVNCT 54NVT594TVR9ETVTTTFGRTFGRETF GAIUYFREWHF Hi Claire, it's Shane. I staked your boss. Love you :) 3 PS Don't worry, it was wood not silver.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Love you too :D

_MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp has entered the chatroom_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Hey it's nice being back in Morganville.

ILoveBunnySlippers: Hey bro, it's Shane on Myrnin's laptop.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Huh?

ILoveBunnySlippers: I staked Myrnin 'cuz he strangled Claire 2 days ago. So what's up, dude?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Nothin, just with Eve.

ILoveBunnySlippers: SCORE!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Man, that's weird seeing Myrnin say 'SCORE!' can you go back on yours, bro?

_ILoveBunnySlippers has left the chatroom_

AwesomeDude: Sweet, someone left me on 'Away' not logged out.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Your password is very stupid so I left you logged in.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: lol. And yeah bro, SCORE!

AwesomeDude: I'm with Claire, SCORE!

ClaireTheSmartOne: You're on the couch next to me. Not really 'score' worthy.

AwesomeDude: Shut up. :(

ClaireTheSmartOne: Fine, I'll make it score worthy.

_ClaireTheSmartOne is Away._

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: SCORE!

AwesomeDude: SCORE!

_AwesomeDude is Away _

_QueenGothika has entered the chatroom_

QueenGothika: Hello! :D

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Hey Queen Gothika

QueenGothika: WOOOP you got my name right Michael.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: :D Yay. What's my prize?

QueenGothika: A puppy. ;)

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: SCORE! I pick the breed.

AwesomeDude: Back! Whats this about a puppy?

ClaireTheSmartOne: We're getting a puppy!?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: A- um, a King Charles spaniel :)

AwesomeDude: Seriously bro?

ClaireTheSmartOne: I love those :D And shut up Shane.

AwesomeDude: lol and zombie-lame-girl hasn't said much.

QueenGothika: Bite me Collins.

AwesomeDude: wrong roomie. Ask Michael. :)

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Yeah ask me.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Can I go get the puppy?

AwesomeDude: Why are we getting a puppy?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: I got Queen Gothika's name right, so she told me I can have a puppy.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Do they even have a pet shop here?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Yeah. Shane will go with you.

ClaireTheSmartOne: I'm almost 18! I can go by myself

AwesomeDude: No, you need some muscle :3

ClaireTheSmartOne: Ugh ok :D

**END OF PART 2! Ok, my sister helped me a lot :) Thank you to the people who have stayed with me all the way through from my first story. I hope you enjoyed it.**

**All the characters and Morganville is rightful property of Rachel Caine. I own nothing. (Not even clothes, I own absolutely NOTHING!)**

**HorseyCrazy99**

**Sophia**


	3. Morganville on Facebook PT 3

**I STILL OWN NOTHING! :'( Why does Rachel have to own all the things I love?**

**Morganville on Facebook PART 3**

**On the chatroom**

QueenGothika: Guys I think this whole puppy situation has gotten out of hand, Michael I'm sorry but I was jk about the puppy

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: What? :'( You mean there's no puppy

QueenGothika: Nope, there is no puppy

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Then what do I get for getting your name right Queen Gothika? :D

QueenGothika: come upstairs to my room and you'll see ;)

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: SCORE!

AwesomeDude: SCORE! But I'm sad that there's no puppy :(

_MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp is away_

_QueenGothika is away_

ClaireTheSmartOne: you're not the only one :( I wanted a puppy too, but now that I about it, it wouldn't be a very good idea I mean you know with all the vamps that can easily waltz into our home.

AwesomeDude: Yeah, I guess you're right :( but I still want a puppy

_OllieBear has joined the chatroom _

OllieBear: I heard you guys were getting a dog :|

AwesomeDude: Hi Ollie and no we're not getting a dog :(

OllieBear: Haha you wouldn't be able to get one anyway Amelie would have forbidden it; it is after all her house you're living in

ClaireTheSmartOne: yeah well it doesn't matter because we're not getting one anyway

_QueenGothika has joined the chatroom_

AwesomeDude: Hey Queen Zombie chick

QueenGothika: It's QueenGothika :|

AwesomeDude: Whatever, hey Ollie you still here?

OllieBear: yes what is it you want peasant

AwesomeDude: Wow you can be mean Ollie

OllieBear: It's not Ollie it is OLIVER

AwesomeDude: yeah whatever _Ollie _:P

OllieBear: watch it Collins I'm outside your room :)

AwesomeDude: WHAT! Oh well it doesn't matter 'cuz I'm in Claire's room with her!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Dude! SCORE!

OllieBear: SCORE!

ILoveBunnySlippers: SCORE? What does that mean?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Myrnin don't join in, you don't want to know trust me

ILoveBunnySlippers: You're talking to me so you forgive me? :D

ClaireTheSmartOne: Okay, but I'm not coming to the lab for at least another week :|

ILoveBunnySlippers: Aww but I need your help now :'(

ClaireTheSmartOne: well tough I'm not coming down :|

ILoveBunnySlippers: Aww but I got you a present :)

ClaireTheSmartOne: what is it, it isn't something gross is it?

ILoveBunnySlippers: oh no nothing like that it's something you will like :D

ClaireTheSmartOne: Can't you just throw it through the portal

ILoveBunnySlippers: oh no, no, no it will break if I do that :(

ClaireTheSmartOne: I'll send Shane to get it then, Shane, go to the lab and get my present, please

AwesomeDude: damn Claire, do I have to? I mean, no offense Myrnin, but the lab smells kinda funny and it gives me the creeps

ILoveBunnySlippers: I don't know he might open it and ruin the surprise

AwesomeDude: I promise not to open it

ILoveBunnySlippers: ah, but you most likely will drop it :|

AwesomeDude: What you think I'll drop it how clumsy and thick do you think I am Myrnin?

ILoveBunnySlippers: Would you be Offended if I said _very_?

AwesomeDude: Yes, yes I would :|

ClaireTheSmartOne: Myrnin he won't peek or drop it and Shane suck it up and go, oh, and Myrnin if you hurt Shane I'll kill you slowly... and I'm not kidding :|

AwesomeDude: Wow Claire you're kinda scary when you're serious, is it weird that I'm a little bit turned on?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: nope

AwesomeDude: Dude when did you come on chat? It didn't say you joined

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: I know, I used the V.N.E

AwesomeDude: seriously man what does that mean?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Oh sorry thought you knew what that meant, well it stands for Vampire Ninja Entrance :D cool huh?

AwesomeDude: seriously, you just made that up now didn't you?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: yeah, I just used the back door

ClaireTheSmartOne: well this is all very interesting but Shane shouldn't you be going now?

AwesomeDude: aww, fine but can you come with... pleeeeaaaase

ClaireTheSmartOne: Are you _afraid_ of Myrnin, Shane?

AwesomeDude: pfft What!? You.. You can't seriously be, well I mean ha really you think I'm afraid of Myrnin that's just well... I guess maybe a little bit

AwesomeDude: Claire, stop laughing :(

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: lol I can't believe you're afraid of that old windbag, no offense, Myrnin

ILoveBunnySlippers: :| I'm not a windbag and I could easily kill you all if I wanted to, oh and no offense :|

ILoveBunnySlippers: :D just joking

_AwesomeDude has left the chatroom_

ClaireTheSmartOne: um Myrnin that isn't something to joke about

ILoveBunnySlippers: well saying you'll kill me slowly if I hurt Shane isn't very funny either

ClaireTheSmartOne: it wasn't meant to be funny, I was serious :|

ILoveBunnySlippers: oh... I see

ClaireTheSmartOne: hey Eve, did Shane ask to use your car?

QueenGothika: no, wait has he left with my car? Brb I'll check

QueenGothika: THAT SON OF A ***** HE TOOK MY CAR I'M GOING TO KILL THAT ************ , hey who turned censor on?

ClaireTheSmartOne: I did, I don't want swearing on the chatroom

QueenGothika: oh ok, but seriously, I'm going to kill him

ILoveBunnySlippers: Oh Shane's here, Hehe, his hearts going very fast he's so scared I can practically smell the fear

ClaireTheSmartOne: Myrnin, be nice :|

ILoveBunnySlippers: oh ok, he's on his way back, you should of seen him he tried to put on a brave face, but god he was so scared, Claire am I... scary?

ClaireTheSmartOne: not all the time but well, you can be a little scary especially when you're angry

ILoveBunnySlippers: oh um I didn't realize, well I'll just try my best not to be scary :D

_AwesomeDude has entered the chatroom _

AwesomeDude: okay I'm back, so Myrnin, what's in here

ILoveBunnySlippers: nothing for you now, go and give it to Claire :)

AwesomeDude: ok but... is it alive

ILoveBunnySlippers: GIVE IT TO CLAIRE

AwesomeDude: okay, okay jeez, ok I'm handing over now

ClaireTheSmartOne: :O OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: What is it?

QueenGothika: Yea CB what is it

ClaireTheSmartOne: it's a **PUPPY!**

ILoveBunnySlippers: :)

AwesomeDude: wow it's really cute, hey myrnin why couldn't you just chuck it through the portal?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Shane you can't just chuck a dog through an inter-dimensional portal, it might get scared

ILoveBunnySlippers: Exactly, do you like her Claire she reminds me of you

AwesomeDude: Hey Myrnin, what breed is it?

ILoveBunnySlippers: Haven't the foggiest, I just went into the pet shop and got the one that most reminded me of Claire :)

ClaireTheSmartOne: it looks like a King Charles spaniel, aww its sooooo cute :O it just licked me eep! Myrnin I love you so much :D

ILoveBunnySlippers: :)

AwesomeDude: easy there Claire it's just a dog.

ClaireTheSmartOne: :O how could you say that this is not just a dog this is the cutest, softest puppy in the whole world and I love her so much :)

ILoveBunnySlippers: What are you going to call her, I've just been calling her mini Claire for the past hour

ClaireTheSmartOne: um let's see, Shane any ideas?

AwesomeDude: how about, Shane is Awesome :D that's an awesome name

QueenGothika: How about Princess?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: What about Daisy?

ClaireTheSmartOne: I just thought of the best name ever for her you guys wanna hear it?

QueenGothika: yes, what is it?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: come on Claire, the suspension _killing _me, oops wrong thing to say never mind

AwesomeDude: Let's hear it Claire Bear

ILoveBunnySlippers: yes I would also very much like to hear what the name it

ClaireTheSmartOne: okay her name is...

_ClaireTheSmartOne has been disconnected _

AwesomeDude: Oh god Dammit ******** *** ***** ******

QueenGothika: NOOOOO

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: WHAT THE **** wow she got me censored too

ILoveBunnySlippers: :O aww I was looking very much forward to hearing what Claire had called mini Claire

AwesomeDude: wow seriously you're just going call the dog mini Claire till she names it?

ILoveBunnySlippers: yes, yes I am :)

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Guys, I don't want to worry you, but Claire isn't in the house

AwesomeDude: WHAT! WHERE IS SHE?!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Dude I don't know I just realized I can't hear her

QueenGothika: Michael do you have any idea where she is

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: no we've got to go find her

AwesomeDude: are you sure she's not just in the secret room?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: I'll go check

_MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp has left the chatroom_

ILoveBunnySlippers: I'll be there before you can type cutie pie

_ILoveBunnySlippers has left the chat_

AwesomeDude: Cutie pie

**Shane's POV**

Myrnin just typed he would be here before you could type Cutie pie, so being me, I decided to do it, there was a knock at the door just as I pressed the Enter key, _damn,_ he's fast. I ran downstairs fully dressed in black baggy jeans, a grey t-shirt and grey, white and black running shoes. I answered the door "Damn Myrnin, you're fast." He was staring at me like a freak. Then he coughed and asked "Where did you get your trainers? They look good, I can't find footwear anywhere in my lab." What are _trainers?_ And he came in bunny slippers. "What are trainers?" He shook his head, muttered something then scolded "Trainers are what you hip kids call 'sneakers' and no time for dilly dallying! We must _go and find Claire!" _Dilly dallying? When I started to ask he just rolled his eyes and dragged me into the darkness.

"Before you ask little one, we're going to the Founder to report Claire missing. This is serious because she is a neutral and therefore no harm is allowed to come to her." He sounded so worried it made me even more scared. I just nodded as he ran straight into Amelie's office, she was napping –drooling as-well– in her computer chair so pig-like I almost laughed, but I was smart and grew up in Morganville and I knew not too or bad things to me. I coughed and she bolted right up and took a swig of some rum. "Oh yeah, that hit the spot!" She said, drunk. "Enough of this time-wasting nonsense, Claire is missing! DO SOMETHING, YOU FAT OLD DRUNKEN RETARDED PIG!" Myrnin screamed at her. Amelie blinked then laughed and said "Okay my good friend." She sobered up and explained "She's missing? Jason must of- wait Jason is dead. Oh! I remember, before I got drunk, I asked her to run a couple of errands then report to me." We heard a bang from the closet, then another one and splintered wood appeared, and one more 'BANG' and Claire practically fell out the closet. "Amelie- drunk- locked me in- closet." Claire said in-between breathes. She collapsed in a heap on the floor, I rushed to her side and shouted "Claire! Wake up!" She mumbled something about no and tired. "Shane, she needs rest. I'll carry her."

"No, I'll carry her."

"No!"

"No, I will carry her, she's my _girlfriend!"_

"She's my apprentice."

"And she's my _girlfriend_"

"I'm stronger than you."

"I'll carry her!"

"What reason do _you_ have?"

"She's my GIRLFRIEND! YOU CRAZY BLOOD SUCKING LUNATIC"

"I marked her!"

"Well I'm going to marry her!"

"Fine, you win Shane."

About time! I picked up Claire and she put her arms around my neck. She woke up and mumbled something I interrupted her softly "Shh, you've been locked in a closet for a few hours, you need rest." I kissed her again but this time on her soft lips. She fell back asleep and I got in Myrnin's car and got ready for bad crazy driving.

It wasn't as bad as I expected, and I expected someone to die, so it was really bad, he definitely hit a lot of...objects, I hope it was objects anyway, it could've easily been people. When we got home I carried Claire up to my bedroom, lay her on the bed and opened up my laptop.

**Chatroom!**

QueenGothika: So did you find Claire?

AwesomeDude: Yeah, I just got back, she's lying on my bed.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Somehow, I don't think I should say this...BUT, SCORE! :D

ClaireTheSmartOne: I stole Shane's iPhone...Dude, when the hell did you get a 4s one?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: BRO! YOU GOT AN iPHONE 4S? I hate you -_-

AwesomeDude: Hahahahahahahhahahahahahaahh ahahaahahahahhahahahahahahah a Ollie, get off my account! How'd you know it was me? :(

OllieBear: Right you lot of ****** let's get to work...Wait a minute, who turned my censor on?

_ClaireTheSmartOne has left_

AwesomeDude: it was Cl- Eve.

QueenGothika: YOU LITTLE- TOOL!

AwesomeDude: Shut up skanky zombie queen.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Bro, not cool.

OllieBear: I shall go over and rape Eve and turn her into a vampire then force her into divorce from Michael and marriage with _me_.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: NO WAIT! IT WAS SHANE!

OllieBear: Then I shall rape... Never mind. Bye.

_OllieBear is away_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Ha! It worked!

AwesomeDude: You made him almost rape me... bro, not cool.

OllieBear: Thou have returned.

AmelieTheIcyQueen: Stop copying Shakespeare my love, I uh mean my mortal enemy who I despise.

AwesomeDude: Amelie, everyone knows about you and Oliver doing it. And I'm still pissed at you for locking my girlfriend in a closet (I'm making out with her now 'cough cough' SCORE!)

ClaireTheSmartOne: Hey

QueenGothika: when you come back online CB? I didn't see it.

ClaireTheSmartOne: I hacked the V.N.E

QueenGothika: lol still got a sense of humour, through all the hell of Morganville :D

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Backdoors rock.

AmelieTheIcyQueen: Oliver and I did not do it. What is _it?_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: SEX :D

_QueenGothika has left the chatroom_

_AwesomeDude has left the chatroom_

_ClaireTheSmartOne has left the chatroom_

_AmelieTheIcyQueen has left the chatroom_

_Stalker548 has left the chatroom_

_JenniferIsStalking has left the chatroom_

_GinaTheHotManiac has left the chatroom_

_OllieBear has left the chatroom_

_Stalker has left the chatroom_

_CaptainObvious has left the chatroom_

_PrincessBitch has left the chatroom_

_Richard'Mayor'Morrel has left the chatroom_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: OH MY GOD! REALLY? ARE YOU ******* WITH ME?

GayStalker: Hello Michael... ;)

GayChatUpTalker: Let's have some 70 year old guy fun.

_MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp has left the chatroom_

**On a different chatroom**

QueenGothika: Let's hope Michael doesn't find this secret chatroom.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Hello :3

AwesomeDude: Oh well. So anyway, Claire, tell them what our new puppy is called.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Shane is awesome. SHANE! I THOUGHT I CHANGED MY PASSWORD, OFF MY ACCOUNT NOW! You changed your password to ILoveShane123 ... So I figured it out. Byeee

AwesomeDude: Hehe :D

ClaireTheSmartOne: I'm calling her Roxi :)

AwesomeDude: Nice

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: I like it.

ClaireTheSmartOne: I love Roxi so much! I love her more than anything 3

AwesomeDude: *cough cough*

ClaireTheSmartOne: I love you more than the dog, Shane. Don't be stupid :)

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: I'm bored.

_QueenGothika is away_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Holy crap! Queen Gothika just- hrnb9uedhey7fhcdvioaregnvfhr aeoufvbn**SHE ROCKS** bh9fiovyuf4edovy**SCORE!**hediofe6ourdfuuva

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Anyway, o what up? Nooo she broke my 's' key! (I copied the 's') :(

QueenGothika: Here's a new keyboard.

ClaireTheSmartOne: I'm making out with Shane while the puppy is nipping my toes. Haha it tickles :D

AwesomeDude: I have that effect on people.

ClaireTheSmartOne: The _dog_ is tickling me -_-

AwesomeDude: hehe, I need to ask you something urgently important. Meet me at the park at 8, waait it'll be dark, at 5pm.

**Private Chatroom.**

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Dude, you sure about this?

AwesomeDude: Yeah, I mean, she's 18 in a few weeks might as-well do it now, bro.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Ok well, stop talking to me and go see what she said.

AwesomeDude: k dude.

**Back on the main chat**

ClaireTheSmartOne: yeah ok.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Shane?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Shane I see you typing! :/

AwesomeDude: sorry had to sort something out, :)

ClaireTheSmartOne: I said yeah.

AwesomeDude: k

ClaireTheSmartOne: As long as I can take Roxi with me.

AwesomeDude: Sure, I love the cutie pie.

RoxiTheSpaniel: hdfnecfmd, fved759-p7t4 hnblf, oetrh3rq3rf, gwg foiwt htrre fbotrh, kcvndofu heiokhfds dycfwr

AwesomeDude: I made the dog an account now she's stepping on my keyboard I gave her. :/

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Haha :D Queen Gothika you there? You've been quiet.

QueenGothika: :) Hehe

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: What are you doing?

QueenGothika: nothing :)

_ILoveBunnySlippers has entered the chatroom_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: oh hi Myrnin

ILoveBunnySlippers: oh hello there Michael

ClaireTheSmartOne: hey Myrnin I named the puppy you got me :D want to see what I called her?

ILoveBunnySlippers: what did you call her?

ClaireTheSmartOne: I called her Roxi :)

ILoveBunnySlippers: that's a lovely name for mini Claire, Oh and I need some help, the machine is malfunctioning again :(

ClaireTheSmartOne: Damn, not again what did you do to it?

ILoveBunnySlippers: well I was... um making some tweaks and it kind of well... blew up

ClaireTheSmartOne: :O NOOOOOO DAMN YOU MYRNIN! HOW COULD YOU BLOW IT UP!

ILoveBunnySlippers: well apparently quite easily

ClaireTheSmartOne: okay, I'm on my way

_ClaireTheSmartOne has left_

Claire's POV

I can't believe he broke the machine it took me ages to fix that and I made sure it was tamper proof, oh Myrnin you idiot. I went through the portal, OMG the lab was a complete mess, worse than usual "Myrnin! What the hell happened" he replied with "well you know I said it exploded? Well it actually _**exploded**_!" OMG how could he explode a blender "WHAT! You made the blender explode" he said "well sort of, it's just I needed to make a few well... adjustments."

"Oh Myrnin, why couldn't you jus-" Myrnin lunged at me and kissed me on the lips, I slapped him in the face "MYRNIN! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" he looked at me and said "I don't know I just, well couldn't control myself" he got on his knees and continued "I can't get you out of my head, I love you" OMG WTF did he just say he loved me? "Myrnin, I don't love you, in-fact this is kind of awkward because I don't love you! I'm inlove with Shane; I'm going to the park to meet him there now." I checked my watch. '4:20' that gives me 40 minutes to get ready and leave with Roxi. Just as I walked to the portal Myrnin grabbed my arm "Don't go, I need help with the blender explosion." I shook him off and hopped in the portal to the Glass House.

I was welcomed, with a cosy warm breeze from the house, I patted the wall and Shane walked in from the kitchen, he saw me and asked with concern, "Hey, you ok?" I wasn't really ok, but if I told him Myrnin kissed me in the lab, Myrnin wouldn't be kissing anything ever again because he would be chopped up. "Yeah, I'm fine just a little wonky and tired, a good shower will set me straight, 40 minutes, remember." He smiled at me and nodded, and then he went upstairs to get ready. The shower was refreshing and I had time to think about what Myrnin did, and what I should do to make sure he doesn't do it again. When I was ready, wearing a silk light pink blouse, a cute skirt and silver & pink heels, I hopped downstairs and saw Shane lounging on the couch, I managed to silently sneak up behind him and scream! "AHHH GOD, SHIT! Claire! Don't do that!" Shane shouted. I laughed and called out from the hallway "Shotgun! I asked Eve for the car." Shane came up behind me and whispered "Something's wrong, you can tell me, it's ok, Claire, I won't be angry, I promise." I was nervous, and Shane could sense it. "It's nothing. Myrnin was acting weird, that's all_." _ He could tell I was lying and he was hurt. Maybe if I tell him then say if he hurts Myrnin I'll dump him... "It's Myrnin, he... he kissed me, I slapped him, hard, there's even a mark! Please don't go mad at me." I felt his muscles tense up and I flinched. I heard him exhale a breath then he turned me around and looked into my eyes. "I won't hurt him and I'm not mad at _you,_ but you better keep me away from Myrnin or one of us is going to end up dead, and it won't be me." I was relieved, and I fell into his embrace until he walked me to the hearse with Roxi.

We arrived at the dog park, and Roxi ran all over the grass getting her silky soft fur all muddy. "What did you want to ask me?" I asked Shane. He paused, kissed me then told me "I wanted to ask you... it may sound dumb but please listen." I nodded at him reassuringly and he continued, "Claire, this is going to sound completely insane but move out of Morganville with me and Roxi! Please Claire, I love you." I love Shane, so much. And I can easily leave Morganville, but I can't just leave... "Shane, I can't just _leave_ I have a job, I've still got to finish college and, well I just can't." He looked frustrated. "Claire, please." I couldn't say no when he used that tone. "Ok Shane, we'll go. When are we going?" He smiled at me as he stood up and said simply. "We go tomorrow."

I called "Roxi! Come here girl!" Roxi came running and jumped up at me. I put her lead on her collar. She was auburn (like my hair colour) with white patches.

**On the chatroom**

QueenGothika: Ok, I walked out in the living room, and there are a load of bags and boxes, what's happening?

ClaireTheSmartOne: I'm leaving Morganville, with Shane and the dog.

QueenGothika: You're leaving? What! That's crazy, you can't just leave I'll miss you way too much

AwesomeDude: Eve, we're leaving I'm sorry we'll miss you but we got to go, we can't stay here forever

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: well I guess I can't stop you I'll miss you, and Eve & I will visit. I'll miss you a lot, bro

ClaireTheSmartOne: I'm going to miss you so much! Love you both

ILoveBunnySlippers: You're leaving, I see, is it because of me? :'(

_ClaireTheSmartOne has de-activated all censors_

AwesomeDude: Finally. Myrnin you _kissed _my girlfriend you BASTARD!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: He did what?

ILoveBunnySlippers: I'm inlove with Claire. Oh I love you so much Claire.

AwesomeDude: Disgusting dick! Get the _fuck_ out of the chatroom before I go over there and rip you to shreds!

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: and I'll _help _him!

ClaireTheSmartOne: Guys, don't. He didn't do anything wrong!

AwesomeDude: He _kissed_ you!

ClaireTheSmartOne: Um...I kissed him.

_AwesomeDude has left the chatroom_

ClaireTheSmartOne: Before you ask guys, I only lied to him because I knew he would kill Myrnin if he thought he kissed me.

_ILoveBunnySlippers has left the chatroom_

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Okay... Now Shane might hate you. I'd rather that prick die than you & Shane break-up.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Shane doesn't hate me, right? Ugh God, what have I done? :(

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: He loves you but what you said to him was pretty stupid. Go tell him the truth before I do.

**Shane's POV**

I was outside; resting against a tree in the shade on my iPhone4s (heh, Michael hates me for getting that) chatting with Claire and Michael, when Claire told me _she kissed Myrnin_ I just lost it, I went crazy, my mind was set on leaving Morganville on my own, Claire was in the kitchen at the table. I just picked up her bags and boxes and ran to her room. When I was finished I sat back outside.

"Shane, I know you hate me but I can explain-" I cut her off by putting my hand up to her and telling her. "Don't. I'm not stupid. At first I sorta was, and went nuts and put all your stuff back, but I thought it through. I now understand that something took over you and you kissed him. I think I should leave Morganville by myself until you understand how you feel towards him." Her face looked sad and shocked but she blinked it away and explained to me "Look, Shane, I lied to you about kissing him because I knew at that moment if I confirmed that Myrnin kissed me you would've done something you probably _wouldn't_ regret. I love you and- wait, did you put all my stuff back?" oh well oops! I knew she would get to that. "Uh well, I'll help you re-pack. I'm sorry I was just so angry. I love you."

**On the Chatroom**

QueenGothika: Sorry I left without logging out earlier on.

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: It's fine, sweetie.

ClaireTheSmartOne: I want to move out _now_, Shane.

AwesomeDude: Okay. Eve, I'm taking your hearse. :)

QueenGothika: Oh no you're not.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Here's 25,000 dollars, go buy an awesome car then we leave.

AwesomeDude: Sweet. :D Where did ya get this cash?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Around... Now _go!_

AwesomeDude: Ok :D

ClaireTheSmartOne: Be back soon, Shane. :)

AwesomeDude: I will :D

_AwesomeDude has left the chatroom_

**Shane's POV**

I have no idea where Claire got the money but I just went with it. I walked into the car place, it had pretty nice cars, I looked at an 8 seater car, it can go fast, and it's big, shiny and silver with fiery blue streaks in a messy cool way. "Wow, nice, does it have a sunroof?" A sunroof car would be awesome. I always like nice cars, but who doesn't? "Yeah, this baby has a sunroof, can go up to 200 miles per hour, a rare 8 seater and you can change the paint before you leave. Only 5000 dollars, dude." Nice. So I bought the car and drove it back, I like the silver paint and blue fire design on it. I parked the car in the driveway and opened the Glass House door, "Got a real beauty, only 5000 dollars." I told Michael. He walked to the window and looked out. "Whoa, cool car, bro. When you leaving?" I shrugged and just replied "Soon, I guess in an hour." He nodded and I went in my room (and ended up on Facebook.)

**Awesome Dude (Shane)'s wall**

**Awesome Dude: ** Leaving Morganville in an hour with my beautiful girl, a cute puppy oh and Claire.

**Claire Danvers: ** Ehem, who's this girl?

**On the Chatroom**

AwesomeDude: The beautiful girl is called Angela, Angel for short, and she is a stunning silver, she has a blue fire design as-well and is a rare 8 seater.

ClaireTheSmartOne: Oh, it's a car... men and their cars -_-

AwesomeDude: Oh, lol. If it makes you feel better I love you more than the car. A tiny bit more.

AwesomeDude: Just kiddin CB, oh and how come on my wall it said your full name but on here it's got your user name?

ClaireTheSmartOne: Because I made my username different on the chatroom. :) leaving here in half an hour ;)

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: :'( I'm so traumatised.

AwesomeDude: Why, bro?

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: I dunno just thought I should say that, dude.

AwesomeDude: Haha okay... Anyway I'm going for a half hour nap.

ClaireTheSmartOne: And I suppose I better be saying bye to Myrnin.

AwesomeDude: No, I'm coming with you.

QueenGothika: See you guys soon! :D

MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp: Bye dude. Plus, BACKDOORS ROCK!

_AwesomeDude is away_

_ClaireTheSmartOne is away_

**At the lab**

**Claire's POV**

I just left the Glass house and now I'm in Myrnin's lab with Shane. He didn't seem that angry that Myrnin kissed me... "Hey Myrnin, we're leaving Morganville and just thought we should say bye." He nodded and Shane looked awkward and was he _shaking_ "Shane, don't be scared..." I kissed him and Myrnin coughed "My lab is not appropriate for snogging now do I at least get a hug?" I rolled my eyes as I hugged him. Myrnin was my friend; I can trust him most of the time. "You were my favourite assistant, Claire, and I will use facebook to chat with you." Okay... we left and went back to the Glass House and got our stuff (including Roxi) and got in the car, we both got our phones out and...

**CHATROOM!**

AwesomeDude: ya know, I might actually miss you lame, zombie, ugly girl.

QueenGothika: And I'll miss you jackass!

ClaireTheSmartOne: SHANE! OFF THE PHONE YOU ALMOST CRASHED! DUMBASS! Love you Eve! I'll miss you so much! You better visit. :D

QueenGothika: I will! Holy crap! Some guy just burst in here and oh god. HELP!

_QueenGothika has been disconnected_

_MichaelTheGuitarPlayinVamp has been disconnected_

AwesomeDude: Oh god no...

_**Fin**_

**Just joking! End of PT 3. :D This is over 4600 words so I'm proud of that and Part 4 shall be done very very very soon. Like in a few days! :D R&R or I will hunt down your location, knock on your, steal all of your sweets, cookies etc and EAT THEM WHILE I HAVE YOU TIED UP AND WATCHING MWAHAHAHAHA**

**But seriously, did you like it? ^.^**

**Q&A: who the hell burst into their house?**

**Q&A: What was with Myrnin raping *re-reads chapter* I mean kissing Claire?**

**Q&A: What do you think of the idea of Claire & Shane leaving Morganville?**

**Thank you! I love all my reviewers, friends, frenemies, enemies, bffs, followers, and people who favourited this very story x3 :) love you and please keep reading :D**

**~Sophia AKA Weird person who is stalking you ;) **


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